I remember going to bed destroyed, and waking up in tears. I’d have random people calling me a slut and just being reminded of things that have never happened. A past friend of mine was very jealous that her ex boyfriend had a so-called crush on me. That past friend decided to make a fake instagram account to tell people that we had slept together, which was a complete lie. I got messages from people asking if I had slept with him. I immediately denied everything people had said. I was so confused as to who made this instagram account, I was so close with this person that I never would have thought it was them. At the time I was very depressed and this situation was not helping. I would throw my phone across the room and curl up into a ball and cry. I remember being so afraid of going to school and having to face people, who just thought I was some sort of love-seeking maniac. My boyfriend at the time would always just tell me to delete my accounts, but I loved social media I didn’t have the heart to do it. Even though I was being made fun of and being told to go kill myself, I didn’t want to let the person win. It kept happening for weeks, I was so afraid to tell anyone what was going on. I finally opened up to my mother about it, I showed her all the screenshots and messages that people have sent me. She reported the account, but it was never taken down. I was absolutely devastated. Cyberbullying is real. Including in this day of age where people love to be on their phones and trash talk about people, but they won’t say anything to their face. I was so blinded by my friend and didn’t even realize it was her, because she acted so nice in person. In reality she was the one trashing me online. It took me a whole year to get over the situation, and I even lost contact with her ex-boyfriend, who was my best friend for over 2 years. Cyberbullying hurts, it hurts the victims as well as the person who is the bully. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to stop whoever was running the account, but I knew that I could block it out. Whenever I’d get a text message or a DM I wouldn’t read it. This helped me a lot because I knew that whoever was doing this was dealing with something too. If you’re being cyberbullied, know that you aren’t alone. There’s a whole world with people who are afraid of having social media, or they’re even taking their accounts down because of these people. Don’t give up without a fight, if you give up that means they’re going to win. I know because I survived, and you can too.
This was it, the moment when I had to walk across the stage with 700 other people in my class. This was going to be the most nerve wrecking day of my life, and let me tell you it was. I remember being terrified and shaking. It got to the point where the people on the stage who were shaking my hand were asking if I was okay. I was SO scared. I got back to my seat after picking up the thing that holds my diploma and I wondered where the time went. I worried so much about if I was going to fall or if something was going to go wrong, that I forgot that I actually just walked across the stage and I'm officially done with high school. I know people go through that as well, maybe at their weddings or some important huge event.
We're so worried about what's going to go wrong that we've actually forgotten what we're there for! Trust me it's completely normal to worry, but God doesn't want us to. He wants us to trust in him that everything is going to go well. He's got your back! He wants you to know that you are LOVED, and CARED FOR, and WONDERFUL, and BEAUTIFUL. Everything is on a plan for you, from your wedding to the day you retire. Everything is already done. Whatever you're scared about tomorrow that's keeping you up at night is already going to happen! God's got you! He won't let anything that's not In His plan happen to you, IF YOU TRUST IN HIM! If you walk along the path he has settled for you, then girl you are good!
Trust in God that whatever is going to happen will happen. Don't miss an important moment of your life because you're scared of the what ifs that are going to happen. He's with you and he's not going to let anything happen to you!
When you pass through the waters,
I'm a huge fan of chicken nuggets, and enthusiastically excited about what God as in store for my life. My other half is currently in the Air Force, so a lot of blog posts will be about the military as of right now.
Incase no one told you today:
YOU ARE AMAZING
YOU ARE LOVED
YOU ARE ONE OF A KIND
YOU ARE SPECIAL
YOU ARE MAGNIFICENT
YOU ARE WANTED
YOU ARE A MASTERPIECE
YOU ARE WONDERFUL
YOU ARE JOYFUL
YOU ARE TALENTED
YOU ARE GREAT
YOU ARE FANTASTIC
YOU ARE A QUEEN
YOU ARE LOVED BY SOMEONE WHO MADE YOU
YOU ARE KIND
YOU ARE YOU, don't let anyone change that.